Don't embarrass the waiting staff!!

Now, since I've stopped smoking I've become a major grinch (calming down now!) and things that I used to laugh at (I'm starting to laugh again) while the other waiting staff were pulling their hair out no longer makes me laugh(oh but it does), I'm also going bald.
So we have decided to let you all know what makes us blush due to embarrassment & anger so you can either not do it or help us out by laughing when you see some one else do it, that helps us calm down. (bear in mind that other things my come up on this list and disappear again depending on, lunar cycle, calorie intake within the last four hours, condition of kitchen humor etc.) So from the Copper Staff to you.... By the way none of this is in any way a reflection of the Copper company policy and Copper Restaurant has made it clear that it does not have any control over what is written here! If you want the company bit go to www.copperrestaurant.co.uk
this blog is really just a gossip column

Ok, after much debate here is our top of the embarrassment/anger list:
1. Who gets to pay the bill.
Don't argue with each other over who is going to pay the bill in front of your server! Its rude, it is soooo rude that we have made a sign that hides behind the till until needed.

2. Please don't ignore your server.
We only come to the table to serve you e.g, tell you some things or take an order not to annoy you, please pay attention, it's sad when we have to stand over you and treat you like children just to get your attention, this applies especially to big tables where there is always one person who talks over the top of the server then demands to know why they didn't get told what the fish of the day was (you did, you didn't listen) didn't get another drink at the same time as the rest of the party (you were asked did you want one 3 times but never answered) and most importantly for our temper control, really you need to let us know if you have a problem or would like something else when we ask you, not when we are taking the order for the table across the restaurant from you.

3. Napkins.
Ahhhhh, place them on your lap when you sit down.

4. The menu is a complete list of the stuff we have.
If we were ever to have burgers/pizza/onion rings/pepper sauce/melon balls/jelly/pavolva/tinned fruit it would be on the menu, we don't really mind that some people read the menu in the window come in and ask is that the menu to be told yes, but when they sit down and read the menu again then ask for stuff we don't have and complain, we get angry!

5. Mustard
The nasty yellow variety, why???

6. Cancellation of bookings.
Ring us... 028 417 53047. Let us know you aren't coming, we get the restaurant all ready for you to come and see us, tables dressed, wine chilled etc, we tell the others that we are fully booked and feel for them when they tell us how they were meant to come in on Tuesday and book but forgot and lied to the other half that they did book the table ( this happens more than you would believe) So its Saturday night and we have turned away maybe 4 tables and there it is..... Poor little table, born to feel elbows, warm plates of food, lovely full glasses but no... It will remain lonely, nothing to support, it feels no warmth, no love and why? Cause no one let us know that it wasn't wanted. Then the trouble starts, picture the scene....
Phone rings
Us: Good afternoon Copper restaurant.
You: Could I book a table for Saturday night please.
Us: I'm sorry we are fully booked for Saturday night, can I take your details and if a table becomes free we will give you a call!
You: Ok, (you give details) please I really need a table I kind of already said I had one booked, its our anniversary/ birthday etc. What ever you can do, just sit us anywhere please.
Us: We will do our very best!
End of call
Now its 9pm Saturday night, the kitchen is sitting at a cozy 26 degrees, Neil is still cool but on the floor there is a problem.
Table 3 were meant to be here half an hour ago and they ain't answering their phone, are they on their way, we will hold the table for another 15mins. Times up for table 3 so we try ringing the anniversary/birthday contact details, no answer... now two senarios can occur, the first is that we give the table to the first walk in, cool table filled.
the second is that no one walks in for the table which is more likely as its now 9.30pm.
So Tuesday we get a strange phone call from birthday/anniversary demanding to know why
1. They were told we were fully booked when their friend just walked in off the street and got a table!
2. They heard from a friend that there was a table empty all night so why couldn't they have it?
In both cases its not good. See what happens just because you didn't ring to cancel, you evil person you.





Ah ha...... our cunning yet devious plan for world domination is at last coming to fruition NOT!!!!! Yes the nicotine cravings are going and the funnies are coming back but OMG we now have customers doing all the bold things on our list just for the crack.... Yes you know who you are Friday night table of 5, see if you are going to break our unwritten rules you have to do it in style like these guys did, make us laugh, not cry!


And so on............ To be amended!